Ron Carlson
"Plan B for the Middle Class"
I
Hartwell: A+
DeRay: C-
Blazo: D
II
On the U.S.S Fortitude: A+
Fort Bragg: B-
Sunny Billy Day: B+
The Tablecloth of Turin: A
A Kind of Flying: A-
III
The Golf Center at Ten-Acres: C
The Summer of Vintage Clothing: D+
Plan B for the Middle Class: B
Response
To begin, I would like to say, that I truly believe there is something special about this Ron Carlson. He takes his craft seriously and it is demonstrated clearly in the pieces that he sent in for review; I expect great things from him in the future of his career should he choose to pursue this path further. With that said, out of the three pieces, he sent in, only two of them should be published under our name. The stories in question: “Hartwell” and “On the U.S.S Fortitude” exemplify the best of Carlson’s style with their relatable messages, the nuance within the text, and how the structure of the story lends to all these elements to bring it all together; they are also an interesting and entertaining read to add on to that. The final story, “DeRay,” does this as well; but to an inferior extent as the first two, and not being as entertaining but still an interesting read with what it does do well.
To elaborate on my decision, I will focus on the stories I recommend being published to explain where “DeRay” falls short in comparison. I’ll start with “Hartwell,” my personal favorite of the trio selected. In “Hartwell,” Carlson masterfully builds to the message on just how unnerving and horrifying it can be finding something of yourself in another person through the eyes of his Narrator, Dowry, as he tells the reader about a fellow named Hartwell. This focus on Hartwell is what allows the reader to get a glimpse into the kind of man Dowry is with his constant assertions, in the beginning, on how he and Hartwell are so different from one another; which he sets up in the very first paragraph: “I’m just going to tell his story, a story about a man I knew, a man not like me, just some other
man.” Immediately giving us the main conflict with this emphasis on other. By doing this, Carlson tells our minds to keep track of how this develops throughout the story; this allows the reader to catch the tiniest details like this: “She wasn’t like Hartwell’s Laurie–at all–her name isn’t important…” That extra space between “at” and “all” is so simple–so easy–to overlook speaks volumes when Carlson shows us this significant moment in Dowry’s past. Carlson shows us that there is something similar between Hartwell and Dowry but the latter continues to deny it all. The placement of this statement is exactly what I mean by Carlson’s nuance blending with the structure of his story as well as the message to create such fascinating and interesting stories to read.
“On the U.S.S Fortitude” is much the same but in a different way than “DeRay” and “Hartwell.” This story’s setting plays the biggest role in shaping every aspect of it, unlike the others. Both “Hartwell” and “DeRay” rely on the inner reflections of their characters and their thoughts to shape the story the setting does not impact the way the message Carlson is trying to deliver is displayed. “On the U.S.S Fortitude” it is the opposite; the setting plays a critical role to the message while also having a Narrator, in this case, a Mother, observing and commenting on their current situation. The story takes place on a carrier, a device with close ties to the military, which Carlson takes advantage of throughout to convey his message: The responsibility a single Mother must have to keep her ship sailing smoothly. Carlson, again, introduces this to us in the first paragraph: “This is a big ship for a single-parent family.” Once again opening the readers mind slightly to the bigger picture with this specific choice of words; which is only cemented through each carefully crafted scenes with the Mother and her two children.
Compared to the other two “DeRay” is lacking in this regard. It has a decently interesting Narrator, referred to as Ace, and a relatable message about Responsibility vs Freedom which Carlson symbolizes through the Motorcycle Ace becomes infatuated with because he associates it and its owner with the very idea of freedom. Again, Carlson opens the readers mind slightly to the larger message he is trying to convey by giving the conflict in the first paragraph–in the first sentence no less as well: “One thing led to another. Liz and I started fixing up our place before the baby came.” Just from phrasing alone, Carlson gives the most important piece of Ace’s character by showing how there is not excitement that he and his wife are about to have a baby. That concept, while done numerous times, is still an interesting subject to explore and it remains so in this piece. But, that does not make it entertaining and fun to read; no more stimulation besides that initial peak of interest in the beginning. The rest of the story is a slog to get through that drags on with a few interesting scenes and thoughts from Ace such as, “I hated this car. It had always been too heavy and too slow.” Which is an excellent metaphor for Ace’s mounting displeasure for his new responsibility and the desire for the light sensation–the freedom–that he associates with the Motorcycle. Carlson is a great writer with tremendous talent and it is because of that talent this piece stands out as a weak one when compared to two of his most excellently crafted works. Therefore, “Hartwell” and “On the U.S.S Fortitude” should be prepped for publishing while “DeRay” is better off not.
Links
Amazon has his stories and collections
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